That smile on her face...

 As she made her way through the crowd... She could sense all the eyes that stared at her; some talking about her character, some wondering about her past, some envious, some admiring, some making fun, some feeling sorry, some busy in their own world and some – just smiling. She tried smiling at all the staring eyes, more to comfort herself than others. Only if you noticed her closely, could you see that they were nervous smiles. Only if you noticed her closely, could you say that there was a lot behind that pretty face, a lot behind that beautiful smile and a lot behind that evident silence. She went to her table in the canteen... Yes, her table. She liked to call it that way. It was in the farthest corner of the canteen and overlooked the beautiful garden below. She smiled at seeing the “love birds” in the garden, sitting hand in hand, looking in each other’s eyes, talking, blushing, laughing. She wondered how many of them were going to make it till the end. She looked at the crowd around her, laughing, enjoying, teasing and having fun! And she wondered again, if she could ever be like that. Her books were the only friends she had.

                He was sitting at his favorite place too, the table right in front of the girl. She was cute, he thought. No, pretty. Maybe, she was beautiful. Duh! He gave up. She was just wonderful, simply wonderful. He thought of the first time he had seen her. It was before a year at the same place, at the same table, smiling as she read some book; Wuthering Heights it was, he remembered. The wind softly teasing her hair, making them fall on her face. She tucks them gently behind her ear unaware that he was going crazy over every action of hers. Amazingly, even after a year, he still went crazy by merely seeing her. If only he had the skills of Rumi, he would write pages and pages about his love for her; a love that had risen from pure admiration. And it wasn’t just her appearance, she was one of the few sensible girls he had come across; intelligent, smart and mature. But she was a mystery; nobody knew anything about her past. What was known were rumors, assumptions, talks and gossips – and he didn’t believe in any of it. He believed in her. He believed in what he believed to be true. Or rather, what he wished to be true!

Even after a year of being here, she couldn’t gel up with anyone. Neither did she talk to anyone, nor did anyone talk to her. In the beginning people tried to talk, but her overly introvert nature drew them away. People talked about her, she knew. Her silence was considered an agreement to whatever was spoken, she knew that too. She had seen rumors destroying the lives of many, and before she realized, she had become a victim of the same! There was a time when she was happy, carefree, loud, perhaps more enthusiastic than the whole crowd around her put together. She had cared for no rumors, no gossips. And it wasn’t until that one day.. The one day of her life when everything she’d built, every relation she had counted on and every dream she had seen, came crashing down and changed into nothing! 

He wondered why this girl had ended up in this small-town college, far away from her home. Why wasn’t she talking to anyone in the college? She was older than her batch mates, perhaps a year or two. He wondered what the reason behind that was. Why didn’t she ever mention anything about her life? Her parents, her friends, her family, anything! He wanted to find out more about this wonderful girl of his dreams. He wanted to know everything about her. Not that it would alter his love, just to understand her better. But how? She never spoke a word with anybody. And he, didn’t have the courage to go and talk to her. He doubted if she would even recognize him as a classmate! But somehow, he felt that this girl had a lot to say, a lot to share. She needed someone, he was sure. But then why did she build this wall around herself? A wall too strong for people to break in and too opaque for them to see what’s inside.

She had lost all the courage, all the hopes, had totally given up on life after that incident. It was like a blow on her face and what had followed, was only worse. She never had the guts to approach anyone after that. She had been played with, deceived up to the extent that left her numb; full of emotions, yet empty. And right now, she saw a man walk in the canteen. For a minute, she couldn’t believe her eyes. The same face, the same curve of his cheek bone, the same beard that tingled her face every time his lips had touched hers. The same man she had loved, she had dreamt of having twins with, wanted to spend her old age with. Memories rushed like a bullet train tearing its way through the woods. She was still confused between reality and hallucination when he made his way through the crowd, towards a boy sitting on the table right in front of her. Immediately composing herself, she hid her face in the light yellow dupatta she had been wearing, quickly collected her things and made her way to the door, trying to be as unnoticed as possible.

But luck, or rather destiny had not played with her enough. She ran right into the dread she wanted to avoid. Her dupatta exposing her masquerade, she came face to face with him. And what followed was something she wasn’t ready for. She saw his eyes, burning with mixed emotions – anger, surprise, hatred, fear, and as she hoped in the farthest corner of her heart, a little guilt. His fists clenched and she looked at the strong arms that had always scared her. “You whore! What the hell are you doing over here?” the man shouted at her, making everything around her stop. The laughs, the people, the noise, everything! It all seemed to zero down on her. She could hear that one word ringing in her head, hitting her like a hammer. Whore? After whatever happened, he called her a whore? She bit her lip, pleading her tears not to come out just this once. “How dare you come in front of me again?” said the voice, this time louder and fiercer than before. 

He was shocked! Why was his friend insulting the wonderful girl, talking to her in such an indecent language? How did he know her? He asked him to stop insulting her like this, but his friend went on. “This slut, this bitch.. You know what she does, man? She goes around sleeping with men and then accusing them of rape! She tried to trap me as well, but I exposed her plan to everyone and then she had the guts to blame me! Seriously, me? After she was trying to come all over me, she blames me dude, for raping her!” and the man lifted his vicious gaze from the girl and looked at him. He was speechless at this. He looked at both of them; the man, his best friend who was accusing the girl, and the poor girl, red with fear and embarrassment and almost in tears. Somehow, he didn’t believe his friend. 

She ran out of the canteen, directly towards the girl’s hostel. She couldn’t take it anymore! She had expected her past to leave her when she had left that town, that college, those people, those accuses. But it didn’t! It came right back to her, right when she was trying to cope up with a new life, right when she thought she could finally move on, right when there was a faint ray of hope. It had been hard for her to start this new life and when it seemed she was finally adapting to it, her past proved to be an obstruction; just like the mountains that block the rain clouds, turning the land behind it into a desert. She could never forget what had happened. After being raped by her own boyfriend, she had had to face the humiliation of people ignoring and talking about her, rather than believing her. She had been taunted by people that it would have definitely happened with her willingness. And then that man, the same man who tagged her as a whore forever, had very proudly announced that he never loved her, that she was the one crazy behind him and wanting to get into bed. Why would he mind if the girl wanted to be a slut? “One he didn’t have to pay for”, he had said between vulgar laughs. And what had happened today, was the final blow. She couldn’t stay to see her life being ruined again. She had gone through it once, and it was more than enough. She couldn’t face it again, she couldn’t fight again, and she couldn’t see herself trying to cope up each day with the horrors of the past. She wanted to run away from here, away from these people, away from accuses, away from pointing fingers, away from rumors! But there was no place left where she could go now, except for one; near her parents. And now, she knew it was time for her to go there.  She wanted to leave, as quickly as possible. She closed her eyes for a moment, smiled at the memory of her parents. And then, she took steps towards them.

Nobody moved from their place in the canteen, nobody uttered a word. It seemed like all of them were frozen, deeply pondering on what had just happened. He was not one of them; leaving his best friend staring behind him, he had run behind her. But, she had locked herself in the room. He banged on the door, pleading, shouting, for her to open the door. But she didn’t. And as he turned silent, he heard was a soft thud in the room. Fear gave way to panic and he immediately looked around for something to break open the door. His eyes fell on the fire extinguisher and with trembling hands, he managed to break in. He let out a cry of horror on seeing what was inside. His wonderful girl was hanging lifeless from a rope on the fan. Others had come rushing in, hearing his shouts. They started dismantling the rope and bringing her down, but he knew, it was too late. Too late for them to save her. Too late for him also; to confront her, to support her, to dry her tears, comfort her, to make her smile, share her pain and, to give her life. And between shock, loss, terror, pain, he glanced at the beautiful face, again. She was smiling, he noticed. But it wasn’t the nervous one she always used to carry; it was an innocent smile, exactly like a newly born baby. And through the unstoppable flow of tears, he too, smiled.

It's a small small world :)

I kept pondering about what to write here for the last few weeks.. Unlike in everything else I do, I prefer being a perfectionist when it comes to writing for my blog. I kept thinking about what should I put down here that people would like and I struggled to reach NOTHING but this, towards the end of my rigorous thinking exercise. I have thus decided to write a recent incident that happened in my life, without bothering about the size, content, language and other atrocities that it might give birth to. 

Well, this happened to me recently, on my way back from a trip... Being a forgetful person, I was sure I would've left behind something for strangers to discover this time as well. But what I, and for  that instance, my parents had also not expected was that I would forget my passport! :O

But I did, I forgot my passport on my flight.. Probably one of the worst mistakes of my life! (Well, people did make me believe so). After trying to show off my wonderful Japanese visa to my boring companions, I must've dropped the passport while trying to entertain them with other things that my handbag carried! How foolish.. you all must be thinking? Well, think all you can. I expect and have been bearing all the taunts people toss at me following the narration of this incident! The worst part, I did not realize the mistake I had committed and would have been ignorant of it, hadn't been for my father who asked me to produce my passport as soon as I entered my home.

Lucky am I,  to have wonderful parents and yet more wonderful luck! The former, for not showering me with scoldings right away and the latter because I was informed I am getting my passport back the very next day. Yes, I am a lucky bitch! (As people would call it). You might be wondering how all of this is related to the heading I gave this post, right? It so happened that the cleaner who found my passport handed it to an Air hostess. The gracious lady happened to belong to Rajkot, which happens to be my dwelling place. And what could be termed as "being lucky" just got luckier! Her cousin was a teacher at my school! Not going into the details of my telephonic conversation with her, I'll take a leap to the end of our conversation. She asked me to mail three documents to the airline's official mail ID and no sooner did I do that, she dispatched my passport. In the next 24 hours, my passport traveled from her to her brother and then to me! And now, I am able to show off my wonderful Japanese visa to people again! :P

An unexpected, memorable and positive punishment for a stupid, silly and never-to-be-forgiven mistake, isn't it? Now then, don't you agree as well that it's a small world after all? ;) 

An emotional outburst!

I tried my hands at poetry... Hope you like it! :)

YOU

It's been more than a year now,

I want to forget you, but how?

Just last night I had a dream,

Today I doubt, was it a whim?

You & I sit in a lush green field,

Dreams of dreams we both build,

"I can talk with you for hours", you say;

That simple lie does make my day..

You ask me to wait and not move on,

I do with a hope, that's newly born.

You keep me waiting, for a long time,

Did I ever mean, more than a dime?

They asked me not to fall, you wouldn't catch,

But the hole in my heart, needed your patch.

No one to reciprocate the intense feelings,

I felt like a songbird, that lone sings..

Then what did you do that held me thus?

And see far fetched dreams for both of us?

Are you a mirage, just an illusion?

Or an unending marathon, I began to run?

Whatever it is, you taught me much,

And hurt me bad without a touch;

You took me for granted, wasn't I dumb?

To suffer a pain that makes me numb!

Broken Strings

The moment he rested his head on my shoulders, it occurred to me that it was the first physical contact we actually made in two years..The feeling on my skin transported itself to the rapidly beating box in my bosom and resulted into a smile! We had always been close.. He was my superhero and best friend. I grieved about how things had changed between us. The guy who had loved me since the day his eyes rested on me, had barely exchanged a couple of words with me, in the last two years. It is a lot more than just two years actually.. Ask me and it is 730 days without him. 730 days of being abnormal. 730 days of seeing him daily and turning away, pretending I haven't noticed. 730 days of being sure he realized it and yet, I couldn't help but notice how badly he tried to ignore me. How badly the valley between us gradually kept expanding! And it hurts; emotionally. And it aches, far more than any bruise on my body!

Time heals all the wounds.. But can a broken glass ever be mended? Can it be put together again to it's original form? No. It cannot be. And even if it is mended, the cracks remain forever! And that is what has happened to you and me. People kept filling our glass with so much fog, that it was impossible for us to see each other! And then one day like the fragile glass, our relation broke into pieces. And all because of one reason, which you are well aware of. The same waters you had scolded me for swimming into, were now the one your boat was sailing on! But what made you forget me? All those times? All those memories? And promises? Did I not matter to you any more? Didn't you even think once about us? Our relation? Was it so important for you to sail? That you never came back to land? 

I waited for you.. To come back, and for once ask me to forget everything and come back to normal. But you didn't try.. All you did was make one half hearted attempt to make me accept you, with all the transformations. But you didn't realize, I had accepted you from the very beginning. Exactly the way you had become. But it was impossible to nurture our plant without your sunlight. Did everything else matter to you more than us? The ones who had been with you in your victories and downfalls were now nothing! How did you forget all those days when we promised to save each other from every threat and problem?  

Don't forget all that, dear. Don't forget us. Don't forget me! Our bond cannot be so weak. Our promises cannot be so fake. And your absence cannot make things better. But alas! I can no more ask you for anything, because the right to be your priority has been taken over and I am sorry for not winning the battle.. I could have, but for you, I choose to lose and I am grieved at how you missed to notice that too?  

My dear brother, I only want to tell you that I have never had any problems with your decision. But it only broke my heart to see you walk out on your sister for someone else's. But let's stop the blame game right here. To you, I only want to say that I was, I am and will always be there for you. Because no matter what happens, a sister is always a  sister and her prayers would always protect her brother!

But remember Bhai,

 "You can't play our broken strings, 

you can't feel anything,

that your heart don't want to feel,

I can't tell you something that ain't real.

Oh, the truth hurts and lies worse,

How can I give any more,

When I love you a little less than before!"

Origin of Spices

The following article was written by me for a Malaysian friend. She is the editor of a newspaper completely directed by teenagers. I am so proud of her! :)

          

           Writing about the origin of spices is like collecting clues about an unsolved mystery. There is no direct proof of where it all started from. During the excavation of Egyptian tombs dated back to 3000 BC, archaeologists found traces of spices. This is probably the earliest mention of spices. And not just in Egypt, paintings on the wall of the palace in Knossos, Crete also show an ape picking up saffron which one of the most precious spices. An interesting document called Ebers Papyrus from 1550 BC, throws light on how spices were then used in practice of surgery and medicine. Spices have thus been with men since the very beginning. Myths and stories and poems of ancient times have been inspired by spices. One of the myths states that the fragrance of spices is favoured by Gods and helps you to have a better afterlife. Biblical poems also mention spices. Even if the origin of spices does not point to anything specific, we can be sure of its existence before men could express it in words.

            “A spice is a dried seed, fruit, root, bark, or vegetative substance primarily used for flavouring, colouring or preserving food. Sometimes a spice is used to hide other flavours,” says Wikipedia. The search of undiscovered spices has played a major role in the discoveries of various unknown lands on earth. The French word espice, which was later termed epice from the Latin word spec, is where our term spices come from. Its origin has been associated with the discovery of unknown lands by explorers which resulted in the discovery of spices. The earliest uses were related to medicine, surgery, magic, preservation and religious rituals. Various spices originated from plants and trees. They were usually imported to far away lands, which could be one of the reasons why we are unsure of their origin. As the spices travelled long distances before reaching their destination, one cannot know where exactly they came from. Spices have provided human race with a huge variety of tastes. Every corner of the world has its own special spice which makes our lives spicier right from sunrise to sunset!

           

             

  



Being Kidult! ;)

                        Sometimes you need to be so much at the same time -- a good daughter, an understanding sister, an obedient student, a supportive friend, a perfect girl friend and a lot more... and then there are times when you become a bad daughter, an irritating sister, a naughty student, a boring friend and an over possessive girl friend! But no matter what, a girl is and will always be one of the best creations of God..

                       Today I am going to talk about the girl nobody knows better than me.. A girl who would soon turn 18 and is expected to learn the norms of being a perfect lady! I am going to talk about me.. The soon-to-be adult who wants to still be a child. I can't believe I would no more be considered a child... The tag of an "adult" would soon be put on me.. And no more would my mistakes be considered innocent, no more can I blame someone for taking my decisions.. Freedom would come with it's own teachers to teach me new lessons! I feel like a glass of cocktail, with various emotions running a marathon inside me.. "Grow up, be serious about life!","No, no.. There's no fun in being all grown-up types!!","You have to face this world on your own now","Oh.. Stop being so philosophical!","This is not going to lead you anywhere","You're gonna be someone boring if you take it so seriously!!","You're wrong..","No! You are..."
"Hush! Calm down, dear mind", I hear myself soliloquizing! And then again, I go down the lane of confusion... I realize that it is not just one year added to your age, it is a lot more than that. It is that point when you learn to walk on your own.. Your parents no longer hold your finger everywhere you go. It is that point when you have to accept the totally ridiculous outcomes, because it is was your own decision! It is when you feel closest to your friends and parents, yet far away!

                      Today, I played with my old toys.. The same way I did before 10 years. My mom wanted me to discard these old possessions and make room for new things.. But I did not have the heart to give away any of my old things! I felt like a different happiness when I was playing with the toys and enjoyed it sooo much.. My parents wanted me to give it away but I was not ready to part with my rediscovered treasure! My grandmother laughed and asked my parents to let me have them for she thought I was saving the toys for my children! I was shocked for a moment.. How my sweet old lady was already seeing the dreams of my marriage and her great-grandchildren, when her grand daughter had not even finished school! She would no longer ask me which chocolate I want or which story would drive me to sweet dreams.. I was now expected to act like a mature, grown-up girl! You can't blame her, in her times girls got married at 18 and look at her grand daughter, still sits in her father's lap, plays with teddy bears, demands for a chocolate after her results, fights to see Tom & Jerry and you know what's the worst part... She can't even cook!! :P
I laugh and tell her I'm gonna marry a chef so that I don't have to cook but she turns her head away and starts mumbling indistinctively... I give her a tight hug and announce that I am always going to be childlike! I love being crazy and if no one marries me, I'll stay with her all my life and eat her head! She tries to get angry but can't help smiling and the drama ends! But the very next moment, my mind goes back to her talks and I blush at the thought of getting married.. I am sure every girl gets this feeling at some or the other time! It is not like the only aim of a girl, to get married.. No, definitely not! But it is one of the dreams she sees since early womanhood. To be married to Mr.Right and have a family of her own.. And trust me, every girl reading this would be smiling right now! :) 

                             So, this is the confusing account of the confusing state of my confused mind at this confusing moment! I would be turning 18 in two days.. And I am so excited to be an adult and legally do stuff I was not allowed to do till now... (Mind you, I am only talking about driving and voting!) I want to be able to take my own decisions, I want to be the ripe fruit who is independent! But I don't want to leave behind my craziness, my stupid dreams, my childish talks, my toys and my teddy bears! Somehow I want to be both, a child and an adult at the same time!

But is it possible....to be a kidult?

An original short story! :)

Because I was unable to post in the last few weeks, I'm going to give you a double doze this time! Bear with it, dear readers! ;)
This post deals with a book written by Sudha Murthy; Gently falls the Bakula. As a result of a school assignment, I tried writing an extention to her story. It is just my imagination and holds no resemblance to any person living or dead!

Saving the Bakula

         Shrimati and Shrikant had been married for more than 10 years now. And it had been two years that Shrimati had left Shrikant, who failed to fulfill his duties of a husband. No, she had not given a divorce to Shrikant, for that would’ve spoiled his reputation in the society, she only left. Their marriage had been perfect till then. But, it was the “reputation thing” that spoiled it. Shrikant was so obsessed with having a nice reputation in his wide ocean of IT that their marriage, Shrimati’s dreams, her happiness and everything was secondary for him.

          Shrikant was an IITian and Shrimati had done her Masters in History. She even had a scholarship in one of the most prestigious universities of US waiting for her. But for Shrikant’s sake, she left behind all her aspirations, gave up her career and stood beside him; like an ideal wife. Shrikant loved his wife, but lacked the quality to set priorities in his life. He was so ambitious that he spent day and night working for the firm and Shrimati gradually became only a means of giving him support and being a good hostess for the numerous parties Shrikant threw in honor of his clients.

          Shrikant still remembered the day Shrimati left him. It had been a normal day --- Shrikant was doing an over time at his office. As usual, he had asked his Secretary to inform Shrimati that his traveling bag must be ready, for he had to catch his flight to Germany soon after dinner. It was normal for him to be a busy bee; that searched for nectar in the flowers. In Shrikant’s case, the clients were his nectar and their companies, Shrikant’s flowers!

Sitting in his office right now, Shrikant realized that in his close knit web, there was no space for their marriage, no space for the dreams they saw together, no space for all the promises he had made, no space for family time, no place for Shrimati! But Shrimati was there beside him, in thick and thin; supporting him, treating his guests well and trying to manage her husband’s busy schedule. But now, there was no Shrimati. There was no love, no happiness, and no warm welcomes at home; there was no home! It was just another apartment in the posh Bandra line, so huge and so quiet, that sometimes it scared Shrikant to live their alone. There was nothing to look forward to in life. Shrimati was gone and like a spider that gets entangled in his own web, Shrikant was trapped in the web he created for himself.

Shrikant was the CEO of one of Mumbai’s largest IT companies. He was on the epitome of his career and had everything he ever wanted. But, absence makes the heart grow fonder. Shrikant wanted Shrimati, rather needed Shrimati. With his world falling into pieces, Shrikant was near to depression. It was not like he lacked the presence of a woman in his life. There were maidens out there who were more than willing to have Shrikant. But it was Shrimati’s simplicity, her polite gestures and her never complaining attitude that Shrikant yearned for.

His friends had asked him to give a divorce to Shrimati and get remarried. But Shrikant knew it well; no one could take Shrimati’s place and that he could never love anyone except her. Shrimati still cared for him. She would send him regular e-mails, telling him about her studies, her friends, her new home and the love she got from the people around her. She advised Shrikant to take his medicines on time, to take care of himself and prayed for his good health. But Shrikant had nothing to tell. Unlike Shrimati, Shrikant had nothing but material wealth in his life. With every passing day, Shrikant longed more and more for Shrimati.

          This irresistible longing took shape of an important decision when Shrikant could no longer live without the lady who always gave him nothing but happiness. He decided to quit his job, something that was the most precious thing in his life and choose to go after the true diamond of his life; Shrimati. It was unexpected for people around him. Shrikant was a talented and important person in the company. But Shrikant was adamant and refused to change his decision. He wanted Shrimati now; he wanted Shrimati back, more than anything in his life.

His Boss, who was a good friend of Shrikant, advised him to stay. “It is a stupid thing” he said, “You’re doing so well in your career. You’re going to be promoted soon. You could get any girl you want. Why Shrimati? I can find thousand better girls for you. You don’t have to leave!” But Shrikant was firm as a rock and believed he was taking the best decision of his life. With over flowing emotions in his heart, Shrikant asked his Boss, “Why? Does it take more guts to stand here the rest of my life ringing up a zero? Making nothing out of life? She is the reason I am what I am today. It is Shrimati who had sown the seeds of greatness in me and when it was time for the fruits to ripe, I abandoned her. And what am I doing with life now? Earning, for whom? Living, for what? And contentment... well, I’m nowhere near it!” Shrikant left, with Shrimati on his mind and a smile on his face. He gave a sigh of relief. The door of emotions had finally opened and Shrikant packed his bags of confessions and left to get Shrimati back.  

          It had been 6 hours since Shrikant had arrived in Chicago. The same city where his wife had been dwelling for 2 years now, away from him. The same city that had opened its heart to welcome Shrimati, unlike Shrikant. The same city that loved, cared and treated Shrimati in the right way, again, unlike Shrikant. He took a cab to Shrimati’s place but didn’t know how to approach her. It felt so strange. This was the woman he loved, adored and couldn’t live without. Yet, this was the same woman whom he had hurt, neglected and ignored to such an extent that she chose to leave him.

He was standing outside Shrimati’s apartment now. Seeing a young boy give a bouquet of roses to a girl, he remembered how Shrimati would attach a Bakula flower with her letters when Shrikant was in Mumbai, away from her. And how those flowers, a symbol of their love, would bring a flood of cherished memories in the lonely hostel room. Nostalgia hit Shrikant so hard that he gathered up all his courage and took steps towards love, towards a new life, towards Shrimati, leaving behind promises unfulfilled, dreams unaccomplished and love unattained; pledging to make life better for himself, for Shrimati and for the beautiful future that waited. After all, he had to water the Bakula before it died completely.

A never dreamt of dream, come true!!

I know this is quite a weird title, but this thing that happened to me was too good to be true! I never dreamt that I would be lucky enough to experience it and it was indeed as good as a dream and as awesome as a dream come true!


Ever waited desperately for your results to come? Probably not. Coz you might think I'm talking about the school ones! But no, I'm not talking about that! Neither am I talking about the results of a job interview, nor about a college entrance exam! May be I should just come to the point..XD


Okay, so I applied for this student exchange program sometime around October and I was cent percent sure of not getting through.. It's tough now, I live in a country with the largest population of adolescents! All of them trying to get through and only 28 of them would be selected! And who was I competing with anyway? The intelligent South Indians! The ambitious Mumbaikars! The smart Delhiites! And the toppers of Ahmedabad! I didn't hope to get through but I still finished my form with honest answers and sent it!


After that, it all happened so quick I didn't realize till I reached Delhi for my national orientation.. The mail with "Congratulations, You have been selected..", the local interview, the tele interview, the round of medical certificates, reading mails on time, replying and booking tickets and knowing others who were equally lucky... OMG! There I was sitting with my Chapter Head, wondering if I should apply or not and the next moment, I land in Hotel Mapple Emerald, Delhi with 27 other students from all over India..


Then started the round of orientations and lectures and dos and don'ts! We had a wonderful time in Delhi, getting to know each other and sharing our happiness on being selected! It was great! All of us had talked to each other on Internet, but when we finally met, it was even better!


It wasn't long before we landed in our host country. And the first thing I felt was.... Cold! Yes, cold! After all, it was December and I was not in India, but all the way across the globe, in the island country; JAPAN!


Japan, the land of the rising sun, the land of bullet trains, the land of Tokyo drift, the land of chopsticks, the land of Sushi, the land of earthquakes... And for me, a land where a I had landed with 686 teenagers from Planet Earth! It was a totally new world, that had new friends, new experiences, new lessons, new learning, new family, new climate and new food! We were on a roller coaster ride called Kizuna*, that went up and down but all in all gave us happy memories for a lifetime! I would skip going into the details of my 10 days in Japan for now.. That would be described in my next post!


For now, Akshi Shah has checked in Hotel Narita View with students from India, Myanmar, New Zealand and is unsuccessfully trying to eat her Obento** with chopsticks! ;)




*Kizuna : Japanese word, meaning bond. Also the name of the exchange program.

**Obento :   Japanese meal, is served in a box.

Real men, don’t rape!

The following post is actually an article written by me which has been published in the weekly edition (Rajkot Plus) of TOI. Hope you like it. :)

Just a few days after the news of one of the cruelest sexual assaults had evoked anger in every Indian’s heart, the Chairperson of one of the State’s Women Commission stated that women “are equally responsible” for the crimes against them! At times when we need to talk about the safety of women, we find people who believe women are responsible for the treatment they get. There are a few narrow-minded, rigid people supporting this statement; only a few!

They say it is the way she talks, they way she dresses, the way she behaves and the way she lives her life that provokes men. They say it is her ways that result in her destruction! But, is it actually not the narrow mindset, the lust, the undying hunger inside those inhuman creatures that results in the crimes against women?! Why would a girl go out of her house with the thought of inviting her own destruction?! No, it is not the women, it is not the way she talks, dresses behaves or lives that provoke men, it is the thirst inside those perpetrators, the thirst that gets thirstier every time it is fulfilled, that leads to crimes and disasters like the one in Delhi!

And it is not just strangers that do this to a girl; statistics say that in 40% of the rape cases registered in 2011, the perpetrator was either a parent, relative or a neighbour! Most of the rape cases are not even filed. This is due to a lot of reasons, the girl worried of embarrassing the family, the girl is afraid of confronting the police, who might make the situation worse for her, etc. And she is not wrong! When she is asked to show physical signs of sexual assault, to describe the incident in detail and to “Take money and shut up!”, what else would she do? A girl, who has already been raped, is raped all over again, verbally.

In our male dominated society, parents teach their daughters not to stay out late, be careful with the opposite sex and not to keep their shirts tight and skirts short. They aren’t wrong. But, what they forget to teach is to fight back, to be able to self-protect, to be bold and not to tolerate even a little bit of sexual harassment! What else do they forget to teach? Well, they forget to teach their sons to respect women, to help her maintain her dignity and to see a woman as a woman, and not as a sex machine!

Talking to one of my male friends another day, I got very angry about the increasing rate of rapes in our country and ended up shouting at him and blaming his whole kind! At the end of our conversation, he simply said: “Real men, don’t rape”!! That is when I realised that blaming all the men would just be stereotyping. There are good men around us. But then, being a girl, the incident in Delhi affected me more than him.

In the last few weeks, I witnessed and took part in the candle marches and peace rallies in our country. I pondered more about the actual reason behind everything that is happening around us, and I reached to the conclusion that it is the deep-rooted discrimination between girls and boys that lead to such crimes. If a girl is qualified in self-protection and is brave enough to stop the vulgar behavior from the initial level, i.e. eve teasing or whistling, no men would dare to harass her.

              

For us, the need of the hour is to change! It is time for the mindset of people to change. It is time to make a woman feel safe and secure, be it inside the house or outside. It is time to change our rigid practices. It is time to stop blaming the government and the police, because somewhere, somehow, we all are responsible for what happens in our own society. And it is time for MEN to fight for the rights of WOMEN!! Because after all, it’s a woman who creates a man!

That wonderful thing called LOVE!

There are 4 important things a man's life revolves around; Oxygen, Food, Water and Love!

Yes, love! What do I say about that wonderful thing called love? All the great poets and writers and directors and teachers and philosophers have at some or the other time talked about this wonderful feeling of love! In fact, what do I write that has not yet been discovered about love? In my experience of 17 years, 7 months and 8 days, I've encountered love at almost all stages of life. Be it my parents, family, friends, teachers, critics or admirers! Love has been present since day one of my life! But describing it is a tough job.

It started when my mother gave birth to me, when my father lifted me in his arms, when my grand parents cried with joy, when my family talked only about me. Although, the last part lasted only till my cousin was born (which was just a few months later)!! But, that was my first encounter with love! And I saw the purest form of Love!

Next, I met love when I entered school, when my teacher drew a happy face on my hand, when my best friend shared her last bite of chocolate with me, when my principal gave me a sweet smile in the corridor, when the peons and ayabens of my school shared their lunch with me! My second meeting with love left me with a sense that love had many different forms and could come from many different people!

The third time I encountered love (although I now believe that it was only a lack of knowledge about love), was when I went to watch a movie in the theatre! When a handsome guy with glistening skin and shining eyes and dark hair and magical words entered the screen! But my dreams were shattered the moment he kissed the girl in the movie!

When I was an adolescent, my mom would try to teach me what love was, or rather what love was not! She tried telling me that a classmate flirting with you, dreaming about your crush, collecting pictures of your favourite actor, writing pages and pages describing the captain of your school's football team, fantasizing your crush, was NOT love. It was mere attraction, which was normal and should not be taken seriously. But, believing things only after I've experienced them, I fell in so-called love.
After all, it was the time when girls of my age were dreaming about their Prince Charming (of course not knowing that it was no time for that). I was the same, reading a lott of love stories and watching only romantic movies. I used to dream about Robert Pattinson, Ruzlaan Mumtaz, Hrithik Roshan, Tom Cruise! I used to wait for the Romeo of Taylor Swift's Love Story to come and take me with him, I imagined the Gerry of Cecelia Ahern's PS I love you, writing love letters to me. I used to dream of being the Kareena Kapoor of Jab We Met, the Avantika of Durjoy Dutta's books! My life then, revolved around romantic books and movies and all my girlfriends and I talked about was, how hot xyz guy was! 
It took me almost 2 years to realize that this is what love definately was not! And I understood my mom's preachings only after my first heart break! But as it is said, the worst experiences of life teach you the best lessons!

I understood that love was all about sacrifice, about honesty, respect, understanding. Love was about being together, no matter how many miles or problems or oceans separate you. I understood that love is not merely a feeling, it is something that goes beyond words. "Don't go searching for love, when the right time comes, love would itself come to you!" I had read this somewhere and my definations of love started changing!

And that is what my fourth and most important encounter with love taught me! It left a long lasting impression on my mind, which would help me understand my future experiences with love! My other encounters with love had also been pleasant. My grand mother sharing her Chocobar with me, tears in my sister's eyes before she went to her in-laws, my li'l brother buying me a Birthday gift after saving his pocket money, my Best Friend giving me an unexpected visit, a smile on a strangers face(this happens only in India), a help from someone I used to hate and many other instances.

But, what all the above experiences made me feel was blessed! Blessed to have the presence of this wonderful thing called LOVE in my life! Something I learnt from different people and experiences in my life! I've solved most of my doubts on the way, but the journey towards discovering other forms of love; is still on..... 

Best Friends Forever

When people ask me who my best friends are.. The first thing that comes to my mind is.. My parents! They've been my best friends since the day I was born. And I if there is someone I trust the most, it is them! They always made me do what was right for me, even though it meant that I would hate them for quite some time!

There might be times when you're fed up of your parents and your generation gap with them. But trust me, nobody understands you better than them! And nobody knows you better than them! Remember when you thought you were successful at hiding something from your parents? And then, after a few months they reveal that they already knew it!

The times when you felt dejected from the whole huge world around and just one simple hug from your mother or a few sweet words from your father made you feel like you rule the world! The rush of adrenaline that you feel when your bf/gf is supposed to meet your parents! The awesome feeling you get when you do something great and you see how proud they are of you!

Tonight, before you go to bed... Just tell your parents how much you love them, even if you're not with them... Mail, Skype, Call! Tell them how lucky you are to be their kid! Coz, it is only your parents who would forgive, forget and always, always love you, unconditionally! 

If there is someone I cant live without, it is definately my parents!

Love you Maa and Paa! <3